Gracie................

tried to eat a BEE today! i got her to stop finally...the bee had seen its better days since it could not fly BUT it still had it's stinger and OUCH would it hurt gracie for her to be stung anywhere but especially in the mouth! I bribed her with a treat if she cam inside so she did. She has so far had a busy day. the apartment complex that faces my building had its parking lot fixed and black topped and such and they started way way early and gracie was SO upset and barking and barking and barking to the point i do not like to do and that is told her to shut up in a firm voice which she knows when i say that it means business. they got done with the parking lot late morning so after all of that she took a long nap and i decided to take a short one. she was miffed at me this afternoon because mom came by to take me shopping and i decided for her to stay at home so that mom and i could shop at the same time. i think after the exitement of the bee she is relaxing more now that we are inside.
i had a busy kind of chaotic today....dealing with the EARLY sound of trucks and the smell of tar and such and i had wanted to sleep in today. so got up to deal with gracie and i let her go outside a couple of times for a few minutes so that she can see what is going on from her peep hole in the patio where she can see out. i took a litte nap which if i had not had to get up to be ready for mom to pick me up. i went to the store and had i think a combination of a panic attack and not eating much in the day. my mom was SO supportive when to get a pop for me since i could hardly talk due to dry mouth...we shopped together for a aisle or two and then i decided to go ahead and check out and go to the car and wait. i bought another pop and a candy bar and that helped a bit. i only drank one pop during the waiting of mom in the car. so got home and of course even with a list i decided not to shop more so did not get all of my list but i can deal with not having yougurt or bread for a few days or might try to get them tomorrow at the drugstore since i have to go there anyway and they carry some of the items. so i am back home and gracie is inside and things are better.....
i got a compliment today which i am not sure what to think of it so input...opinions..my mom told me that she had talked to c one of her best friends and c had asked about me and mom told her that i was having a rough time but was able to get by without going into the hospital and c told mom to tell me she was proud of me. i guess i kind of get it that she was acknowledging my hard work which is has been BUT i do not think it is a failure on my part if i have to go inside the hospital and i am sure that c did not mean it that way at all just sometimes i think people do not know what to say when someone is struggling with mental illnesses. so with the day i have it is a good day to remember some lj's.............o.k. even thought it was LOUD this a.m. with the parking lot being blacktopped it stopped by around noon so that is an lj.....mom helping me out in the store...getting an email from a friend who i wondered if he was upset with me and he was not upset with me....a candy bar which is a rare treat that i allow myself....i have been trying to drink more water....and slow yet sure am drinking more....one of my favorite teeshirt is clean so got to wear my hot pink shirt....not buying ice cream today at the store which was a big thing for me not to do but am really trying to not keep it at home. speaking of ice cream i saw in the stores today that ben and jerrys ice cream is making individual servings. the are new so were on sale and were 3 of them for 5 dollars so that is a good price for them.....mom buying wet food for gracie today....so those are some lj's for today so far...perhaps there will be more when i get back from group....oh one more is the river radio station which i really enjoy listening to....so any people want to share their lj's?
OH i keep forgeting thanks for the ideas for breakfast. i talked with nan yesterday and she said that a protein bar is fine for breakfast as long as i eat something else within two hours of that so that is doable.............hope everyone enjoys the long weekend which for people like me since i am not working right now it is just a regular day except that i do not see nan and since she is so booked which is understandable with being off on monday i just can see her on thursday and not work in another day. i do not mind because i feel really blessed that i can see her most weeks two times.
so about food....i have not binged in awhile though overate some....i tend to be the last couple of days eating less food than i should but i think it will equal out sometime soon i hope...