Saturday

i am so glad that mom is back from the wedding she went to and that she and i can get together. it has turned into a rough day with panic attacks and such...i even tried to calm myself down by calling nan and leaving a message and called mom and both of them i called to hear the calm voices on the voicemail...sounds really really silly even as i write this but it did help. i had decided that if mom had not called by now i would think of calling my friends j and k and see if either one could take me to the e.r to get a shot to help with the panic but knew though that being in the e.r. is not a calm place. i am hoping mom is in the mood to go someplace like bob evans for some good ole home style cooking. i must need some protein becaue i am really hungry for some meat or cheese or eggs which since i do not eat much protein and should but often times when i am craving it i can look back and know oops did not eat much protein this time or if i go to the doctor and have low iron and such...today is one of those days when it would be great to be able to get a large table at a place like bob evans and gather the blogger buddies around and sit around and most talk for hours. i think even though i have never met in person i am closer to the blogger buddies than with some of the aquaintances i have and see. a question for the readers....do you find like i that often times blogger buddies are better than some people that one sees in the day to day life? i know that having blogger buddies are always an lj and one can even say some time not just a little joy but a big joy. well mom is going to be here in a few mintues to going to finish getting ready and such.........