Saturday Evening
i really have enjoyed reading what others like in music and some of the favorites reminded me of other artists that i like too. i have to say that today i have now am playing the soundtrack from "once" for about the fourth time. i tend to do that when i get new cd's. i spent a good amount of time before i got out of bed praying - there is just SO much going on in the world and in the u.s. and in the city where i live and with friends and family and blogger buddies. i cleaned a bit but than my knee starting hurting even with taking a pain pill...trying to not push the left knee since i fell on it and it is swelled some. i also have some colorful bruises too. i did get some laundry done.
i have spent a good deal of time between last evening and today pondering about the bariatric operation. i had a wonderful talk with mom about it last evening which is so good because she was against it. i have spent today thinking about it and i think that if or when the insurance covers it i will pursue it. i really for being as large as i am in good health...no sugar issues or heart issues and such. it is my legs that are the issue. i am not sure if i ever have shared about all of my leg issues....each ankle i have broken and have a plate in my right leg and had one operation with it and the right ankle has no cartlidge left and i think after breaking it in 3 places and my leg it was six operations and a year recovery with half of that spent in bed at my mom's place. the only thing that they can do is fuse that ankle which i really do not want and would prefer to have some pain than have it done. the left knee needs replaced is the only real option for it if i do not lose weight. my regular doctor said she thought if i did not have the operation or do something drastic i would be in a scooter or wheelchair in two years. i really want to not have that happen if i can and if even after the operation i need to do that i will but i doubt that i would after losing weight.
a few thoughts about it that i want to share is that the main reason i would do it is for health not so much for looks but that would be nice too. i would like to be able to travel and go to places like a art festival and be able to walk around and such. i also know that i would stick to what i would have to eat and what i cannot eat because i REALLY hate throwing up! i have checked out some hospitals and such and decided on the one here close to me that has the best stats and also is the only one who does it laproptic(spelling wrong i am sure) i also feel like due to lots of past issues that caused the weight gain i have dealt with those and not for lack of better wording do not need that wall of weight to protect me which of course it did not except emotionally. i also know that after going through all of the operation and such i will NOT want to do anything to make myself ill and i can really live without eating some foods and some things like pop....sure i will miss some of those things. i know also one can like take maybe two bites of a brownie if he or she wants without getting sick but why risk it is what i think. i think silly as it might seem i will miss the most regular pop well pop in general. i guess saying all of that to say that i am ready to get rid of ed! i also feel like God is showing me in lots of ways that this is something He wants me to do ...with things he is showing me and also i think with putting my focus right now on this that afterwords the doors wil open for work and that God has been closing doors for jobs due to this.
i know that i have lost a minimal very minimal weight so that is good i just need to get more active in checking what i eat and to start swimming and such. i think since this blog is to mainly deal with ed and me that is why i am sharing so much about it. i have to check if my insurance covers it at last time i checked it did not.
i am enjoying emailing back and fourth with lots of you. i really in the past enjoyed pen pals and blogs and emails to me are like having pen pals. does anyone else feel like that?
i am so glad that i can go to church tomorrow and can go to my small group on monday. i missed church and small group twice now so am looking foward to it as i said. i missed not seeing the kids on sunday too. when some of the woman from church visited me we had some good laughs about some of the things that their kids were doing.
i think gracie has settled down for the night. she was kind of having a grumpy day....lots of activity in the parking lot..my in her opinion being a mean mom since i would only let her play on the ice for a few minutes at a time than she had to come in to get warm...she lays on the ice and then if she gets too cold then she hops on 3 legs and her one paw really seems to bother her when it is cold and wet so i think that i am being a caring mom. yes i do call myself mom since she is my "kid"
well some lj's for today...spending a good amount of time praying.....looking through a craft book to get some ides...getting a bit of housework done...having it a bit warmer and lots of the ice melting some...not binging...having a computer that works....having two great conversations with mom....knowing my sister and bil have a 3 day weekend since they both do not feel good.....i think that this is it for now. peace to all..........
i have spent a good deal of time between last evening and today pondering about the bariatric operation. i had a wonderful talk with mom about it last evening which is so good because she was against it. i have spent today thinking about it and i think that if or when the insurance covers it i will pursue it. i really for being as large as i am in good health...no sugar issues or heart issues and such. it is my legs that are the issue. i am not sure if i ever have shared about all of my leg issues....each ankle i have broken and have a plate in my right leg and had one operation with it and the right ankle has no cartlidge left and i think after breaking it in 3 places and my leg it was six operations and a year recovery with half of that spent in bed at my mom's place. the only thing that they can do is fuse that ankle which i really do not want and would prefer to have some pain than have it done. the left knee needs replaced is the only real option for it if i do not lose weight. my regular doctor said she thought if i did not have the operation or do something drastic i would be in a scooter or wheelchair in two years. i really want to not have that happen if i can and if even after the operation i need to do that i will but i doubt that i would after losing weight.
a few thoughts about it that i want to share is that the main reason i would do it is for health not so much for looks but that would be nice too. i would like to be able to travel and go to places like a art festival and be able to walk around and such. i also know that i would stick to what i would have to eat and what i cannot eat because i REALLY hate throwing up! i have checked out some hospitals and such and decided on the one here close to me that has the best stats and also is the only one who does it laproptic(spelling wrong i am sure) i also feel like due to lots of past issues that caused the weight gain i have dealt with those and not for lack of better wording do not need that wall of weight to protect me which of course it did not except emotionally. i also know that after going through all of the operation and such i will NOT want to do anything to make myself ill and i can really live without eating some foods and some things like pop....sure i will miss some of those things. i know also one can like take maybe two bites of a brownie if he or she wants without getting sick but why risk it is what i think. i think silly as it might seem i will miss the most regular pop well pop in general. i guess saying all of that to say that i am ready to get rid of ed! i also feel like God is showing me in lots of ways that this is something He wants me to do ...with things he is showing me and also i think with putting my focus right now on this that afterwords the doors wil open for work and that God has been closing doors for jobs due to this.
i know that i have lost a minimal very minimal weight so that is good i just need to get more active in checking what i eat and to start swimming and such. i think since this blog is to mainly deal with ed and me that is why i am sharing so much about it. i have to check if my insurance covers it at last time i checked it did not.
i am enjoying emailing back and fourth with lots of you. i really in the past enjoyed pen pals and blogs and emails to me are like having pen pals. does anyone else feel like that?
i am so glad that i can go to church tomorrow and can go to my small group on monday. i missed church and small group twice now so am looking foward to it as i said. i missed not seeing the kids on sunday too. when some of the woman from church visited me we had some good laughs about some of the things that their kids were doing.
i think gracie has settled down for the night. she was kind of having a grumpy day....lots of activity in the parking lot..my in her opinion being a mean mom since i would only let her play on the ice for a few minutes at a time than she had to come in to get warm...she lays on the ice and then if she gets too cold then she hops on 3 legs and her one paw really seems to bother her when it is cold and wet so i think that i am being a caring mom. yes i do call myself mom since she is my "kid"
well some lj's for today...spending a good amount of time praying.....looking through a craft book to get some ides...getting a bit of housework done...having it a bit warmer and lots of the ice melting some...not binging...having a computer that works....having two great conversations with mom....knowing my sister and bil have a 3 day weekend since they both do not feel good.....i think that this is it for now. peace to all..........
posted by mosiacmind at 4:09 PM
3 Comments:
Was wondering if you had seen the movie Juno, or had heard about it? It's about a young girl who give her child up for adoption. It is about what a wonderful gift she gave another person. A gift she blessed on them. It's really a good movie, it's up for several awards. It might be on a few screens and should be available to rent in the next month or so. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts about it.
My sister was thinking about that same surgery. Her reasons were more for appearance. I hope you can get some relief for your legs. You are a trooper to have gone thru those operations and have such a good outlook.
I hope you can find the answer that will suit your situation. Make sure you do your research all the way.
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